Life Cycles - Death and Dying
II - Death & Burial
When A Death Occurs In Your Family
When a death occurs in a hospital, you will be asked to sign a release so that the body of the deceased may be removed to a funeral home. Currently, Beth Torah is working with Sparkman Hillcrest Funeral Home, 7405 W. Northwest Highway, (214-363-5401) and Forest Lawn Funeral Home at Turtle Creek, 3204 Fairmount St., (214-953-0363) - both in Dallas. Please request that the body be sent to the facility of your choice.
If the death occurs at home, immediately contact the deceased's physician and notify the local Police Department. Sparkman-Hillcrest or Forest Lawn must also be contacted to arrange for transfer of the body to the funeral home.
In either case the funeral home should be advised that you are a member of Congregation Beth Torah and that traditional Jewish burial practices should be observed.
No matter where a death occurs, you will receive immediate assistance when you contact the Rabbi and/or the Co-Chairpersons of the Cemetery Committee. These names and telephone numbers are found in the synagogue directory. You may contact them at any time of the day or night. During Synagogue office hours, you may contact the Beth Torah secretary.
The family will need to make decisions on the following issues:
1. Whether you want a chapel or a graveside service -
A chapel service at Sparkman-Hillcrest Funeral Home is best if you expect a large attendance at the funeral. A brief graveside service will follow. It is also possible to have a chapel service at Forest Lawn, and then drive up to the Beth Torah Cemetery for a brief graveside service.
A graveside service is best if you expect a smaller attendance at the funeral, or if a private service is desired.
2. Selection of a gravesite -
If the deceased owns a plot in the Beth Torah Cemetery, inform the Committee Chairman. If not, the Chairman will assist in the selection and purchase of a gravesite.
3. Selection of six pallbearers -
Pallbearers are required for the chapel service, and if necessary, to carry the casket from the hearse to the gravesite. Pallbearers must be Jewish, and sufficiently healthy and strong to carry the heavy casket. Other individuals may be mentioned as "honorary pallbearers." The pallbearers are required to be present one-half hour before the scheduled start of the funeral service.
It will be necessary for you to make personal contact with the funeral home. Telephone Sparkman-Hillcrest, or Forest Lawn and make an appointment to go there in person. If you wish, a member of the Cemetery Committee will accompany you. You will need to assemble certain information about the deceased (Social Security number, veteran information, date of birth, etc.) plus certain personal items belonging to the deceased (tallit, kipah) and take them with you. Bring a checkbook or credit card with you.
You should be prepared to discuss the following with the funeral director:
1. Personal arrangements for the family
2. Selection of a Kosher casket
3. Information for newspaper notices of the death
4. Information for the official death certificate
5. Payment arrangements for services performed by the funeral home.
The Chairman of the Cemetery Committee is responsible for
1. Arranging with the funeral home for the Shomer * (guard) who will sit with the body at all times until burial.
2. Arranging for the Chevra Kaddisha* (Burial Society) to prepare the body for burial.
3. Arranging for preparation of the grave.
4. Coordinating funeral arrangements between the Rabbi, the funeral home and the family.
Casket Selection
As a sign of respect for the deceased, Jewish burial practice encourages the body's return to its natural state..."for from dust were you taken...and to dust you shall return" (Gen. 3:19).
The deceased must be buried in a casket made entirely of wood. Although a plain pine box is recommended by Jewish Tradition, the funeral homes offer a variety of acceptable caskets.
A member or veteran of any branch of the U.S. Armed Services may have a United States flag draped over the casket. This flag is arranged for by the funeral home.
No airtight vaults may be used. Standard concrete grave liners are used in Beth Torah's cemetery, as per Hillcrest Memorial Park's guidelines.
Burial
The funeral should take place as soon as possible, and preferably within 24 hours, after the death. Burial in Beth Torah's cemetery does not take place on the Sabbath, Jewish or American legal holidays. The burial shall be conducted in accordance with Conservative Halacha* (Law) as interpreted by Congregation Beth Torah through its Rabbi.
Preparation of the Body
All clothing and jewelry will be removed from the body prior to ritual preparation, and it will be held in safekeeping for the family of the deceased. The Beth Torah Chevra Kaddisha* will prepare the body for burial. The deceased will be washed in a manner prescribed by Jewish tradition (referred to as Tahara*) and dressed in the Tach- richim*, the linen shroud. Men, (and women, if requested), are then wrapped in a tallit and a kipah is placed on the head.
Shemirah
As another sign of respect, a person will sit with the deceased until the funeral begins. This person is known as the Shomer*. The Cemetery Committee, in conjunction with the funeral home, will make arrangements for the Shomer.
Viewing
Jewish Law prohibits public display of the deceased. Open casket funerals are not permitted.
The immediate family is permitted a private viewing if requested.
Autopsies
Routine autopsies are not permitted because they violate the principal of Kevod Hamet*. An autopsy is permitted when medical professionals deem that it will help others who suffer from the same condition(s) as the deceased. It is also permissible when the law requires it in order to determine cause of death. The Dallas County Medical Examiner and Collin County Justice of the Peace are sensitive to families and cooperate with their desires when they are able to do so. In general, you should consult the Rabbi before allowing an autopsy to take place.
Organ Donations
Because of the emphasis which Jewish tradition places on Pikuach Nefesh* (saving a life) and the general desire to bring healing to the living, organ donations are permissible.
